I started this blog many many months ago. Never actually put anything up here, thinking it would be a waste of my time, and may be. However, so many thing have happened in the recent past, and I thought that sharing may just inform, enlighten, and comfort or assist others in understanding some things about life. Not to say that I may be some form of truth or answer, but maybe to console some others about things that they may be thinking of that they cannot seem to find otherwise comforting in any other place.

I realized a while back that in doing this I may end up exposing some (who may recognize things that associate their situation to the story) to a situation they may not want to confront, but I will only do so with anonymity. So if offended....to bad. I am just full on the B.S. level and don't quite give a damn anymore.

So I was thinking that in initiating this "BLOG", so to speak, I would firstly have to describe myself a bit. Which will require me to actually be honest with myself (for once, or maybe I really am and just don't quite know it yet). In any case, I am really thinking of the rants and raves and daily occurances that run through a mind of experience and logic.

I began reading blogs about a year and a half or so ago. Understanding that most blogs you may encounter here are someone's form of a "Diary" or a complaint session, I never really wanted that to be mine. Although one may not really be able to sit down and blurt through their fingers words without bitches and gripes. I will do my best.

About me: I am just an average dued (sp), trying to get through this life with a path of happiness, moderate success, and the least amount of drama and grief possible. Now we all know that that is not really all that realistic, but it is worth a try. I am of an age that has had the opportunity to run around the block a couple of times and have experienced a couple of things here and there in the interim. Not to say that I know it all, or have seen it all. Never the less, I have seen a bunch.

I experienced the recovery of persons from sincere habits, lower of the lows, and the nothings who came to be something and those who have become something only in their feeble minds. Again not to stand upon a pedestool, just to state that some are much more capable of seeing themselves in a manner in which they exist but to themselves. Afterall we are all small and not as significant as we would all like to think. If we dont show tomorrow, we would be missed for a bit, but not for long after that.

There are so many things that are taken for granted, but they could all dissappear "the day after tomorrow". Those of us who dont realize this are just that "Naive". Does anyone ever realize that Naive spelled backwards is Evian, the water that so many of us purchase on a daily basis. How ironic is it that a company most likely makes millions on the label that just kinda spits it right back in our faces.

So back to who I have become or what I have been leading up till now. Understand I am only going to state a few things here such that I am still protecting myeslf from things that may be fired back in my direction. Militant, I am, ignorant I dont think I classify, ambitious I try to be and to be humble, I search for daily. I dont like the floatation of an ego nor the support of one.

I used to be rather high strung, but a stint of egocentric nobody's kinda cured me of that poison. Realizing that you are a statistic in life really brings you to the realization that you can exist in society without a major focus on your every move. I once read a quote "silence makes no mistakes". I am not too sure how heavy that quote was, but it stuck with my since the day that I read it. The other, which was repeated to me just the other day was "its better to be thought an idiot, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt". That speaks volumes.

Realistically I am just an average human (afterall that is all we are) trying to exist in an ever growing more difficult environment than we can all imagine. If I get nothing more than my own satisfaction out of spending my free time doing this "BLOG" thing then it will be, how should I say....theraputic.

I am sure that I will find myself going from topic to topic and ups and downs frequently...but will do so with as much realism and logic as I am capable. I hope that at least, someone may find this at least desireable at some point.