I could not think of anything better to ramble on about this eve, well could have been survivor, but that could have taken forever. So I thought about some things, and came up with a blurt of questions. We all ask them, and we all would like to have answers. Some of them can be answered, some never will and some we just have to wait...even if it ends up being that they have to hit us in the face. Even then we may not know it at the time, but later on we may understand.

Here are a few (at the end I'll state how long it took to come up w/em):



Do we really need DST (daylight savings time)?

Why does it seem like old people are driving like younger drunk people?

Why dont we send criminals to fight in war, instead of underpaid soldiers?

Why does it cost more $ to eat healthy and less to eat unhealthy?(that could be easy)

Do people really need to pull out in front of you just to turn in 100ft.?

Does love last forever, or is it just that at some point you just have no other options?

When taxes are so high, why are all of our roads so shity?

Why is there so much incompetency in society today?

How can locals go to the same bar nightly? Do they get sick of seeing the same people?

Why do people assume that doctors know it all?

Why is single like a disease? Do all people think or assume that when someone is single that there is something wrong with them?

How can mainstream sports be so popular to the norm and most others be frowned upon like you are carazy for participating?

Do rich mens wives really need to drive 50,000 dollar SUV's to drop the kids off?

Does that contribute to the fuel issues in the country?

Why dont people with money turn the lights off in their homes when they cannot possibly occupy every room in their house at once?

Are people really that inconsiderate of others?

How can so many women desire to have such fake bodies?

When people are wrong in life, why do they put so much emphasis on insignificant wrongs that others may do?

How is it that we can have such a strong desire to have an altered state of mind?

Why is it that we are willing to spend so much money to do so?

How can people succumb to someone else's version of a good time and atmosphere?

Is death really all that bad?

Does Hell exist? how about heaven? What do they look like?

Why can't we start off being old and get younger?

Would we have more to look forward to?

Would you have been happy as an Indian?

Would you have survived if you were?

Do you listen to more music than what the radio provides you with?

Have you ever eaten foods that you didn't know the names of?

Do you have secrets that you have never told anyone about?

Do you love someone that is unworthy of it?

Do you love someone that doesn't realize it?

Are relationships really supposed to be that much work?

Why does everyone say that marriage is work?

Shouldn't marriage be easy, maybe it is just that it was the wrong decision?

Do really hot young women really dig older fat nasty men, or is it their money and possessions that are attractive?

Does it really matter if there are real factual answers to any of these questions?

Well that was twenty minutes and that is enough. I am sure that anyone could, well I guess not anyone, go on forever with that. Hopefully that wasn't too much like a rambling complain session. Or it doesn't make me seem angry. If so I would assume ignorance anyhow.

Maybe I can come up with some deeper questions. Maybe a few more specific questions in one area. That would most likely be pointing fingers and making me seem much more angry at certain things, maybe I'll refrain.

I do want to speak of music in the near future. It has been something that has intrigued me for some time. There are so many types and so many differences out there. I guess that is why I am just so boggled that so many people only opt to delve into the things that are immediately accessible to them via the crap radio.

Wildlife and nature are on my list as well. It is just that they are so vastly incredible and amazing. I will get there though...

word!

There are so many different types. There are the ones we lift, the ones we cannot lift, the stress ones, the emotional ones, the financial ones and the most difficult ones - the ones that sit upon your shoulders. I guess that those are also the ones you cannot lift.



The emotional weights can of course be in so many forms. I am guessing that there are good ones and bad. Most likely the good ones could drive us to be better to others, work harder, provide more, etc. The bad ones almost seem as though they can be more restrictive than anything. It's like someone puts the brakes on you. Its always present in everything. No matter how much you push on through it seems to surface at the most inopportune moments. Like having a great day walking around with a youngster that has no comprehension, and you don't show the surprise, but it surfaces in a person you see. Crazy how one can be so easily distracted.

Weights that we lift can be so therapeutic though. They relieve stress, build strenght, not only physically but also rather mentally. Even though we may not walk around and think "hey I lift weights, I am mentally strong!" We may have a bit of a confidence boost in doing such. I know that when I lifted during my military stint due to inactivity from surgeries, I felt like I was more invincible, even though I knew otherwise. But at the same time I watched one soldier who lifted them religiously and his mental attitude changed week by week.

Those dog garn Financial Weights, its amazing how much they affect us without remorse. When you ignore the responsibility of getting them taken care of, they increase on your shoulders exponentially. But as soon as you take and get them out of your hair you feel like a million bucks. Its like a rabid dog chasing you down a dark alley in the hood. If the dog don't get ya, ya almost know that there are tons of other thins out there that are gonna. Once you take care of them, it almost as though you have no worries, but then again, they come back around three weeks later. I guess we just thank whomever we thank for that ability to take care of them and force them bad dogs back to their homes.

The one group of weights that I have never really felt that I have got a grip with are the emotional ones that are created by relationships. When you care for someone there are certain things that you just take for granted. There are things that you tend to never expect, never foresee and would not imagine that would be capable of taking place. Then one day it all happens. Then the weight hits you in the face in the shoulders in the chest, everywhere. Thing about it is that you must wonder what these others that are involved are thinking. Well at least I do. I guess I have always been considerate of what other people are thinking and how they may feel. Weigh all the circumstances and then make your decisions as drastic as they may end up. But one should not come to conclusions before analyzing the facts and looking in the mirror. There have been a few times that things have gone arye (sp) for me and I am still left wondering how some people are capable of the thought processes that possess them so. I guess mine is not to wonder about how they can think this way but to better learn from these occurrences and make better choices in the future so that they happen less frequently. It will always be a learning in progress for now, and I am also guessing that if we knew how people and things were always going to be there would be no point in living. Its just not really much fun when you have to learn some of these things the most difficult way...by experience.

Here is a link (in case anyone should ever read this) that I found to be so incredibly touching, moving, and flooring all at the same time. At one point I found myself in tears at what I saw:



It is another blog, and I am not sure how I came across it, but it was extremely moving.

I started this blog many many months ago. Never actually put anything up here, thinking it would be a waste of my time, and may be. However, so many thing have happened in the recent past, and I thought that sharing may just inform, enlighten, and comfort or assist others in understanding some things about life. Not to say that I may be some form of truth or answer, but maybe to console some others about things that they may be thinking of that they cannot seem to find otherwise comforting in any other place.

I realized a while back that in doing this I may end up exposing some (who may recognize things that associate their situation to the story) to a situation they may not want to confront, but I will only do so with anonymity. So if offended....to bad. I am just full on the B.S. level and don't quite give a damn anymore.

So I was thinking that in initiating this "BLOG", so to speak, I would firstly have to describe myself a bit. Which will require me to actually be honest with myself (for once, or maybe I really am and just don't quite know it yet). In any case, I am really thinking of the rants and raves and daily occurances that run through a mind of experience and logic.

I began reading blogs about a year and a half or so ago. Understanding that most blogs you may encounter here are someone's form of a "Diary" or a complaint session, I never really wanted that to be mine. Although one may not really be able to sit down and blurt through their fingers words without bitches and gripes. I will do my best.

About me: I am just an average dued (sp), trying to get through this life with a path of happiness, moderate success, and the least amount of drama and grief possible. Now we all know that that is not really all that realistic, but it is worth a try. I am of an age that has had the opportunity to run around the block a couple of times and have experienced a couple of things here and there in the interim. Not to say that I know it all, or have seen it all. Never the less, I have seen a bunch.

I experienced the recovery of persons from sincere habits, lower of the lows, and the nothings who came to be something and those who have become something only in their feeble minds. Again not to stand upon a pedestool, just to state that some are much more capable of seeing themselves in a manner in which they exist but to themselves. Afterall we are all small and not as significant as we would all like to think. If we dont show tomorrow, we would be missed for a bit, but not for long after that.

There are so many things that are taken for granted, but they could all dissappear "the day after tomorrow". Those of us who dont realize this are just that "Naive". Does anyone ever realize that Naive spelled backwards is Evian, the water that so many of us purchase on a daily basis. How ironic is it that a company most likely makes millions on the label that just kinda spits it right back in our faces.

So back to who I have become or what I have been leading up till now. Understand I am only going to state a few things here such that I am still protecting myeslf from things that may be fired back in my direction. Militant, I am, ignorant I dont think I classify, ambitious I try to be and to be humble, I search for daily. I dont like the floatation of an ego nor the support of one.

I used to be rather high strung, but a stint of egocentric nobody's kinda cured me of that poison. Realizing that you are a statistic in life really brings you to the realization that you can exist in society without a major focus on your every move. I once read a quote "silence makes no mistakes". I am not too sure how heavy that quote was, but it stuck with my since the day that I read it. The other, which was repeated to me just the other day was "its better to be thought an idiot, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt". That speaks volumes.

Realistically I am just an average human (afterall that is all we are) trying to exist in an ever growing more difficult environment than we can all imagine. If I get nothing more than my own satisfaction out of spending my free time doing this "BLOG" thing then it will be, how should I say....theraputic.

I am sure that I will find myself going from topic to topic and ups and downs frequently...but will do so with as much realism and logic as I am capable. I hope that at least, someone may find this at least desireable at some point.